Pappy Bob's Profile - Rotten Tomatoes

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Rating History

Japon
Japon (2003)
5 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes

Currently and for the past two years, this has been my choice for the worst movie that I've ever watched. There was just enough hope embedded in the "story" to keep me from ejecting the DVD and walking away shaking my head and cussing softly under my breath. I kept hoping that it would get better or develop into a real movie, but alas I was so wrong. Mother of Saddam Hussein, this was a horrible, horrible, horrible movie.. . and I watched every single second of it.

The lead character was impossible to like; he even despised himself (his only saving grace during the whole film). The shaking camera, repeatedly taking endless, tedious looks at grass and pavement and walls was an artsy effect that gave me a headache, over and over again. It kind of reminded me of the times I forget to turn off the video camera and walk around with it hanging from my neck recording my feet. Unlike the film Japon, my clumsy mistakes were never acclaimed to be cinematic magic.

I'm not some PETA wannabe, but there were some really graphic scenes featuring cruelty to animals that were just pointless and stupid. Come on, what is the point of choking a puppy, you ignorant shmendrik. If you wanted to choke something, you should've choked Mr. Reygadas, the man who directed this stinker. And the final scene with the defiled old woman with her stolen bricks being carried away by rail... that final, endless shot of the tracks leading up to the train wreck must have lasted 10 minutes, but it felt like a lifetime. By the time we finally arrived to the scene of the final carnage, I envied those lying dead among the spilled bricks.

Pappy Bob's pedestrian opinion: Worst movie of all time. It was pretentious, boring, cruel, pointless, and pretentious (I know, but it was sooooooooooo pretentious). I've already put a condition in my last will and testament forbidding the distribution of my final assets to any descendent who fails to swear an anti-Japon oath upon my demise.

August 2014 Update. This is still the worst movie that I've ever seen.

The Flowers of War
7 years ago via Rotten Tomatoes

Heartbreaking story told in the Chinese legendary style.